Radio Silence

I am suffering a bit today from serious sleep deprivation.  Last night I stayed up way too late reading (not commenting, as the thread had already been closed) some random internet drama that I wasn’t really interested in beyond rubbernecking.  A restless baby who has decided that he hates sleep kept me up even later, and had me feeling like I was hit by a bus this morning. (“I got better.”)

Today I spent reading inspired articles written by an old friend who I had not been keeping up with as much as I would like.  Her vivid and visceral descriptions remind me how important the arts of storytelling and poetry are to me and my sense of spirituality.  My beliefs have evolved a lot over the last years, and even though I don’t really count myself a member of the online Pagan community anymore, the core of who I am hasn’t changed.  My people, my ancestors, my tribe haven’t changed.

There are some things I miss, and really have no excuses for not experiencing regularly.  I miss spending time alone in nature.  It’s different when you have toddlers running around, shouting, and putting weird things in their mouths.  But that doesn’t mean that I can’t still have that communion.  I need to remedy this lapse.  I need an infusion of real life.  Deep life.  Life that is thrumming and pulsing in the earth, even as she falls into her winter slumber.

You can’t get that through a screen.  You can’t find it on social media or in an internet forum. The internet is soaked in strife, trolling, and bitterness.  I think I needed this reminder, however painful it was this morning when my poor bleary eyes snapped open.

It’s time to get back to things that matter – writing, reading, living, sleeping once in a while, and just getting outside to enjoy the sunlight and the sights, sounds and smells of the season. The first frosts have arrived.  Clouds are settling low in the sky.  They say it will snow soon.

I have an outline to work on as NaNo is starting in just a few days.  This will probably be my last post of substance for the next month at least.  If I find something that really resonates, I will reblog so that you all can share in my awe at all the other bloggers out there.

See you on the flip side.